


If only we had apple juice

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Black Romance, Caliginous Romance | Kismesis, FTM Dave, Humiliation, Light Bondage, M/M, Omorashi, Trans Character, Trans Male Character, Transgender, Watersports, Wetting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-23
Updated: 2013-12-23
Packaged: 2018-01-05 16:13:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1096004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“You didn’t just agree to this,” Dave said, “you practically begged for it. ‘Please, Dave human, tie me up and make fun of me and make me fucking piss myself’-”</p><p>“I did not say any of those fucking things!” Karkat barked back. “Not like that! I hardly ever even refer to any of you with the suffix of ‘human’ anymore! You’ve got your head so far up your own ass that you can’t hear anything but the sound of your own guts squelching and digesting whatever disgusting sludge your culture considers food.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	If only we had apple juice

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to my lovely beta, stunrunner!

“I cannot fucking believe I agreed to this,” Karkat grumbled. He was standing in an ablution trap, with handcuffs firmly fastened around his wrists and stuck on a chain attached to a frustratingly immovable suction cup. There was no way suction alone could be holding it; Dave must have fucking glued it or something too.

For someone standing in a tub, he was still quite clothed, with his pants and, at Dave’s insistence, his short-sleeved shirt. Said shirt was slightly damp with splatters of cooling coffee, because Dave had thought it was completely appropriate to force-feed him two cups of it.

Well, Karkat had sort of asked for that, but not the spilling part. And certainly not the shitty coffee part. He could have just gone with water, but no, Dave wouldn’t have been a proper kismesis if he hadn’t gone out of his way to make this as obnoxious and humiliating as possible.

So here Karkat stood, legs pressed firmly together for reasons on which he was _not_ going to focus, the nasty unctuous aftertaste of awful alchemized coffee still on his palate. Dave was leaning against the wall, watching him through those stupid fucking shades.

“You didn’t just agree to this,” Dave said, “you practically begged for it. ‘Please, Dave human, tie me up and make fun of me and make me fucking piss myself’-”

“I did not say any of those fucking things!” Karkat barked back. “Not like that! I hardly ever even refer to any of you with the suffix of ‘human’ anymore! You’ve got your head so far up your own ass that you can’t hear anything but the sound of your own guts squelching and digesting whatever disgusting sludge your culture considers food.”

“At least human coffee doesn’t smell like fruit loops fermented in a sewer for a couple of weeks.”

“That’s the replicator’s fault, you nimrod! Good troll coffee is exactly the same as human coffee.”

“How would you know if you’ve never had the fine brew that is Dunkin’ Donuts coffee?”

“Is that supposed to be some high quality brand? What the fuck kind of idiotic name is “Dunking doughnuts”?”

“Doughnuts are a sweet round thing. You dunk them in coffee and they’re twice as good. Wait, do you even know what a doughnut is? Hang in there; I’ll go alchemize some so I can demonstrate.”

“Don’t you dare leave! I don’t want any stupid pastries, and I sure as fuck don’t want any more coffee!” Karkat wasn’t going to say it, but his bladder was plenty full without any additional liquid. “Just let me fucking go.”

“No can do,” Dave replied. The fucker looked so goddamn calm and nonchalant, like they were fighting about any old thing - no, like they weren’t even fighting at all. Like Dave was cool as a cucumber in contrast to the flaring mixture of loathing, embarrassment, and desire that was quickening Karkat’s pulse. “You said you’d say that, and I swore on scout’s honor that I wouldn’t unless you said the magic word.” The human made a useless hand gesture that Karkat vaguely recognized as associated with some human fraternal organization.

“Oh well good thing you swore on someone else’s honor, because you have none of your fucking own.”

“Is it harder coming up with insults when you’re distracted by needing to piss? Because I know you can do better.”

“I am not distracted!” Karkat barked, clenching his legs together more tightly. He desperately wanted to cross them, but he knew if he did, Dave would definitely make a comment about it.

“Whatever you say, dude. If only we had apple juice,” Dave said, glancing over to the remaining cup of coffee on the counter. “I’m thirsty, but there’s no way I’m drinking that tepid shit now. Shouldn’t let it go to waste though.” He quirked a half-grin at Karkat and moved to pick up the cup.

“You’re a fucking sadist.”

“Only because you mewl so nicely when I torture you,” the human replied, picking up the cup.

“No! I am not ingesting another droplet of that foul liquid!”

“Why? You already too full of liquid as it is?” Dave placed a hand on Karkat’s hip and lifted up the edge of the troll’s shirt, revealing his swollen abdomen. “Your pants look awfully tight.”

“What a fucking astute observation. Actually, I’m more impressed that you can notice anything behind those shades that are about as dim as your puny think pan.”

“I’m telling you, your retorts aren’t nearly as good when you’re distracted. Would it help if I unbuttoned your pants?”

“Fuck you - what? Well, yeah, it would fucking help!”

“Drink the coffee and I’ll unbutton it for you.”

“No fucking way.”

“OK then.” Dave shrugged and released Karkat’s shirt - only to press his hand against his abdomen.

Karkat yelped, feeling the already severe pressure jump, and fuck, he could feel it in his urethra; he had almost leaked. He was going to if Dave didn’t stop.

“Stop! I’ll fucking drink it! Just fucking stop and unbutton me.”

“I’ll stop, but you gotta drink it before I’ll unbutton you,” said Dave, no longer pressing, but keeping his hand on Karkat’s belly.

“Fine, just hurry up.” Karkat snapped. He didn’t entirely trust Dave, but fuck, he really needed his pants loosened. It was worth the risk.

Dave brought the coffee over. There was an oil-like slick on the surface and it smelled saccharine and vile, but Karkat steeled himself for the taste. He parted his lips and gulped it down as quickly as he could as Dave poured it into his mouth. A bit slipped past his mouth and dribbled down his shirt, lukewarm and uncomfortable, but most of it he swallowed. The nasty aftertaste lingered on his tongue, but it couldn’t overpower the urgent pressure in Karkat’s abdomen.

“Look at how quickly you swallowed that. You really do want to fill yourself to completely bursting, don’t you? You want to feel yourself wet your pants-”

“Cease your pathetic attempt at dirty talk and unbutton my pants like you promised!”

“Nah, I don’t think I will. You’re enjoying this.” Dave’s lips were quirked into a smug smile as he spun the empty mug with one hand and slid the other to the crotch of Karkat’s pants.

“You lying piece of shit! I despise you!” Karkat’s nook throbbed with arousal as Dave forced his hand between the troll’s legs. At least Dave wasn’t pressing on his bladder now, but if Karkat leaked more than a drop or two, the human would feel it. And considering the spasm he had to fight off as he felt a rivulet of cooling coffee finish sliding down his neck to soak into the neck of his shirt, it might not be long until he hit that point.

“And you love me too, which is why you trust me with your dirty little secret. So what’s the deal with this anyway? You’ve got weird kinks, dude.”

“We aren’t discussing this!” Karkat hissed, feeling his face flush.

“Nope, we totally are. Tough troll titties for you, because even if you don’t want to say shit, I’m talking about it. And I know you can’t keep your mouth shut. Just be glad you aren’t Kanaya. Can you imagine having Rose as a partner and coming out about something like this? The layers of Freudian psychobabble mommy-issues bullshit she’d knit together lightning fast out of thread pulled right off your damn back so you’re standing there buttnaked with everything exposed and a brand-new sweater of overanalyzed.”

Dave paused and smirked as Karkat fidgeted, shifting with visible discomfort from one foot to the other.

“Then again,” he continued, “if you were butt naked, you wouldn’t have to worry about getting your high-waisted pants all nasty, now would you?”

“Eat shit and die,” Karkat spat, giving another yank at the handcuffs. His wrists hurt, but not nearly as much as his bladder did.

Despite his best efforts, the troll felt his muscles give way for a second too long. He wiggled, trying vainly to get away from Dave’s hand, but it was too late. A hot jet of urine spurted out of him and there was no way the human wasn’t going to feel it.

“Fuck fuck fuck,” Karkat swore, fighting his body and just barely managing to stem the flow. “Are you happy you -”

Dave swallowed Karkat’s words with a kiss. The troll’s cheeks burned, and he needed to let go so, so badly, but Dave’s lips on his were as soft and welcome and electrifying as ever. As they kissed passionately, Dave’s tongue shamelessly penetrating Karkat’s mouth, the human moved both hands to Karkat’s waistband, unfastening his belt.

“Don’t quote me on this later, but this is really fucking hot,” Dave whispered as he unbuttoned and unzipped. Karkat shivered at the gentle breath on his ear, embarrassment and arousal coursing through him. “I want to feel you piss.”

“Now who’s the pervert,” Karkat muttered back, immediately using what little ammunition Dave had so kindly given him. He sighed in relief as Dave pulled his pants down past his hips, and the human struggled to get them down to mid-thigh - a difficult matter since Karkat refused to spread his legs at all.

“This was your idea in the first place. Maybe I’m just telling you what you want to hear.” Despite that claim, Dave’s other hand was sliding down the front of his own stupid, elastic-banded god tier pants.

“That’s obviously a lie on so many fucking levels I don’t even know where to begin,” Karkat said irritably, his bladder painfully tight. He gritted his teeth, fighting a losing battle for control, unbearably aroused and desperate at the same time.

Dave rubbed Karkat’s tiny nub with his thumb while his other hand visibly moved within his own pants. Jolts of pleasure electrified the troll as Dave rubbed him furiously, juxtaposed with the agony of his bladder. Karkat knew the human could feel the wetness of his sopping nook mixed with the thin, slippery fluid of his accident so far, and his face burned. He hated this and he loved it and he hated that he loved it.

One particularly quick movement of Dave’s fingers against his most sensitive spot sent such a spasm through his body, a jet of pee rushed out of his crotch and right onto Dave’s hand. The human only rubbed Karkat harder, and Karkat realized he probably only had a matter of seconds before he was going to leak again.

“Just fucking piss for me, Karkat,” Dave breathed.

Karkat tried, but voluntarily releasing muscles he had trained since he was a wiggler was fucking hard. Attempting to let it out just gave him a stabbing pain and the horrible, tantalizing feeling of almost but not actually peeing.

“Fuck, I fucking can’t,” Karkat swore, pulling hard on the handcuffs in anger.

“Relax.”

“I cannot fucking relax!”

“Chill out,” Dave breathed, pressing his lips against the base of Karkat’s jaw. Karkat stopped fidgeting, mostly, just squeezing his legs together, the human’s warm hand still doing the best it could to caress his clit. “Exhale for me.”

All Karkat wanted to do was tell Dave to fuck off but no not really he needed to go so badly he was willing to try anything, so he exhaled heavily. He concentrated on his breathing, inhaling deeply. Little shocks of pleasure made him shudder, and his bladder burned, but then finally, his sore, tired muscles gave way.

Another squirt of urine escaped him. He instinctively clamped but the pressure was too much. More liquid spilled out of him, splashing as Dave stroked him, undeterred. Karkat shifted one foot out, sighing with relief and pleasure at the wonderful feeling of release, piss spilling all over Dave’s hands, running down his legs and soaking his pants, warm and wet and humiliating, knowing his kismesis was witnessing this.

His stream still going strong, Karkat turned slightly to look at Dave, face burning hotter than the Alternian sun, expecting to see a smirk. Instead, Dave’s lips were parted, and that hand within the human’s pants was working just as furiously as the one in Karkat’s groin.

As the flow slowed to a trickle, Karkat entire body shook as Dave’s dexterous ministrations pushed him to the precipice of a different sort of relief. The troll was entirely awash with arousal and shame and relief. He felt dirty but also a tiny part of him was thrilled that Dave wasn’t only playing along well but clearly getting just as turned on as Karkat.

Karkat leaned forward, pressing Dave’s face against his shoulder, as a few more quick strokes of his nub pushed him over the edge. He cried out, guttural and incoherent, his entire body feeling like gold, like sunrise, like everything was not perfect but just was and that was perfect. As he shook and the feeling passed far too quickly, leaving his legs feeling like jelly and his entire self feeling a little bit small, Dave kissed his neck.

The blond shifted back a step and removed both his hands from their respective duties.

“What, are you not going to finish?”

“Nah, I’ll let you do that for me after we shower off and hop into bed,” Dave said, casually reaching out.

“Gross, don’t you dare wipe that - oh FUCK YOU, man, fuck you,” Karkat spat as Dave smeared his piss- and secretion-covered hands all over Karkat’s shirt.

“Yeah, I’m hoping you will once we get cleaned up.” Karkat rolled his eyes, wondering with a stab of irritation why Dave thought that joke had ever had an iota of cleverness. “Just let me go find the keys.”

“YOU DON’T KNOW WHERE THE FUCKING KEYS ARE?”


End file.
